Demise of a History

It was a gloomy day but not Sunday. I was paralysed in my hospital bed. I didn’t know whether it was the pain of my fractures or of my instinct predicting even worse of matters. My great grandma passed early in the morning leaving behind a history that will be recollected for the rest of my life.

I was brought up in her shadow. She used to wake up in the middle of the night just to find whether I was hungry or not and used to serve me with ghee, beaten rice and sugar. I used to accompany her to the rice-mill just to get a packet of biscuits and a big lump of molasses. I used to follow her to the land revenue office just to find a tea-shop selling fried papads on the way. Once I got drowned in our pond, where jute was harvested and since that day during rainy seasons, she used to tie my leg to a stave on a bed-side incase I might follow her to the fields and get drowned again. She was an ocean of love and I too loved her very much and still love her and will always do. There were many times I committed serious mistakes but she was always there ready to argue on my behalf. Last time when I visited her, her poor eyesight mistook me as Rikesh da and the warmth of her weak, wrinkled palms fondly caressing my cheeks couldn’t stop tears in my eyes. She had gone too feeble!

The news of her demise reached my ears very late, after six-seven months and credit goes to Buwa for whispering with mom in Newari but clearly mentioning about her death otherwise everyone was planning to conceal it for more sometime. The news left me dumb-founded; I again almost took the same condition as of when I had been admitted to the hospital for the first time after my accident. Everything has now come to normal but the vacant space created by her absence is beyond words. I still can’t believe that the next time I visit our farm house, I won’t be seeing her. She won’t be there to greet me with her unrestricted love. Fortunately, I was the last one to meet her among her descendants. Few days after meeting her, I met with the accident and few days after my accident, she passed away.

It’s been a year after that and this is a special tribute to one of the most influential icon of my life, a history of our lineage. May your soul rest in peace ma!